Behind The Scenes Our Trash The Dress Adventure In A Cenote

This is one of my favorite Photos of All time!

When I got married, Trash The Dress (“TTD”) sessions were starting to gain traction. There was a lot of buzz around them—but unfortunately, a few movies and TV shows portrayed them in a way that made it look like the dress actually got destroyed. Ripped. Burned. Ruined. And understandably, that made a lot of couples nervous.

So let me be very clear.  In Mexico, trash the dress does not mean trashing your dress.

It means taking your dress into natural, beautiful environments. Walking it through the sand. Letting the ocean splash you. Swimming in the sea. Or, if you’re in Riviera Maya like I was, swimming in a cenote.

That’s it.

 Mike and I chose not to film or photograph a welcome party or rehearsal dinner. Instead, we invested that energy and budget into a trash the dress session—and I have never once regretted that choice.

What I really wanted was the opportunity to do underwater photos with Mike. Our photographer specialized in this style, and I was genuinely excited about it. It felt playful. Different. Very us.

Tip #1

Here’s my first real tip:
Do not schedule your trash the dress for the day after your wedding.

You won’t be up for it. You’ll be tired, overstimulated, possibly hungover, definitely sleep-deprived.

We got married on a Saturday. Sunday we rested and spent time with the guests who were still in town. And we scheduled our trash the dress for Monday late morning.

That timing made all the difference.

You want to hear something interesting?  I looked more like myself that day for our TTD session than on our wedding day.

Nothing like feeling super relax and in love during a photo-shoot

I did my own hair. and it felt relaxed, natural, and very me. It was also a low-cost choice, which I always appreciate when it makes sense.

My makeup artist, who is also my dear friend Narda, had already flown back to home by then. So, I did something I sometimes do when I attend weddings as a guest: I went to MAC on Fifth Avenue and booked a makeup application by purchasing the products they used.

MAC does fantastic “going out” makeup. I loved how I looked. And technically, I didn’t pay for makeup—I just invested in products I already wanted.

And then I just I put my own dress on!

Our photographer Vincent Vanderberg from PIXAN Studios curated several locations for us, and each one brought a different energy.

We started at a small, earthy palapa-style spot south of Playa del Carmen. Bamboo walls. Swings. A very raw, natural feel. We had a beer, sat on swings, laughed, and took photos that felt playful and intimate.

Then we walked along the beach.

One of my favorite little surprises from the wedding made an appearance here—Mike’s Deadmau5 head. At the time, he was a huge fan, so I had a foam head made for him. I had a matching feminine version. We placed them in the sand and took some incredibly fun photos that still make me smile.

We still have them … 12 years later!

And then came my favorite part. The cenote.

Our photographer had booked a private cenote for us—immaculate, untouched, absolutely magical. We took jungle shots first, then it was time to get in the water.

Surrounded by the natural beauty of Riviera Maya

A few realities to know if you ever do this:

• Cenote water is cold.

• Fish will nibble your feet.

• You need to be comfortable with nature.

I was barefoot, wearing foot jewelry (which I wore most of my wedding day anyway), and slowly we transitioned into underwater photography.

Costume Feet Jewelry

The photographer fully submerged with a waterproof camera. You swim. You float. You attempt to kiss underwater, which is far less glamorous than it looks because you’re holding your breath. The buoyancy of my dress made staying underwater tricky—it wanted to lift me constantly.

Tip #2
When you’re underwater, don’t blow air out. No bubbles. Eyes open. Smile. Don’t cover your nose.

It’s uncomfortable. But the photos are worth it.

You may be wondering, in what state was my dress after our TTD, what’s the after math?  Well let me tell you,  after the ocean and the cenote, my dress was cleaner than it had been after the wedding!

Drinks, the dance floor, and a full night of celebrating did far more “damage” than water ever did. Mike has worn his suit again to other weddings. Nothing was ruined.

So no—trash the dress does not actually trash the dress.

As I close this very personal mini-series, I want you to understand why I chose to share my story.

I did it to show you all that I truly understand weddings – in Mexico specifically- from every angle.

I want you to fall in love with my country. I want your culture and traditions to be honored and respected. I want you to have fun.

And I want you to feel confident enough to let go of unnecessary standards and create a wedding that actually feels just like you.

That’s what I did. That’s what we did. And Mike loved his wedding too—yes, he matters. Maybe one day I’ll convince him to write a groom’s perspective journal. We’ll see.

For now, this series comes to a close.

It’s bitter sweet closing this mini-series!

Moving on to February when, I’ll be sharing journals from my couples—many of whom are celebrating anniversaries. I’ve intentionally chosen not to do traditional galleries for my website. Instead, each wedding will live as a journal: with photos, yes, but also real insight, strategy, and advice you can actually use.

Thank you for walking through this experience with me. If you have questions, thoughts, or curiosities, I’d love to hear them.

Until we meet—or until the next story—this is me saying a gentle goodbye to this chapter.

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